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Tomorrow

Tomorrow as the day looms in front of me , I see my destiny unfolding. It would either mean honor or dishonor; for more than anything, I know I will fail to not be so, then there should be some miracle. Hence I should consume something to outshine god, my fate itself, for even I am ashamed to stand in front of him with a failure at hand. Because this would be equal to deceiving someone who loves and trusts me unconditionally, which I cannot bring myself to. But what can I do? I have no fate in the world of success, I cannot surely outshine giants can I? Essentially I should turn away from what is not mine to take. But this I cannot do, for I would mock the gifts that have been imparted unto me. Then alas I have but one way that is too much, but a little worthwhile – Stand my ground and face being mocked about by people around me. I can stand being mocked about, but what about my loved ones. They expect me to cross the doorway and breakaway. Demented in this life, all I can hope for is to be better off the next time.

But who still would ease the pain I inflict?

       Who still would forgive my mockery, Surely

I shall receive atonement or perhaps ……. not?

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Memories

Memories

 

They come and go but they never stay alive for long. We recollect them sometime but they’ll never seem to be the same ; we keep forgetting a part of it. Some of us remember because we have to, some of us remember because we want to, others still because it brings them a smile\tear to their faces. For some of us memories are the only friends in life, it is like an unbreakable vow–“ till death do us part ”. But memories can change us for the better or for the worst.

 

          We can recollect the death of a person we love and turn insane or we could seek revenge for it ( if we can ) ; or we could just remember the whole scene and live with it for the rest of our lives : living with pain until our vow is broken. Even better still we could remember the last time we got a spanking for some mischief we did and have a hearty laugh out of it (few years later). Some memories taunt us, they chase us till we spit it out. And for some others, memories return like a jolt of lightning, it keeps them alive or it gives them joy or regret and pain.

           

AS  for me, I have memories of all kinds. It’s like raindrops. I collect them and they give me definition. And I assure you : they will continue to do so until death do us part

WORDS

 

WORDS have a lot of meaning in them. They are just letters put together and the letters make up a word . The word conveys a meaning that have more impact than actions. Many a times we can get into trouble for the words that come out of our mouth. Speaking is not a crime. Everyone have the right to speak. It is what comes out of our mouth that can land us in trouble. This  could be a test that that we might have to pass. T he test posed here is is “  How much are you willing to sacrifice for some other human being?  This very test that we always fail is what makes us different and unique from others.

 

AND then there are words that can bring us in life. A lonely soul lost in the bitterness of life would be more happy that the happiest soul in the world , just to hear the the soothing words that come out of another’s mouth.  He/she will be so grateful that given an opportunity to help, his / her  power to make you feel good. You’ll be surprised.

 

THESE words invented , published written and spoken can make an impact or change in a person’s life, always for the better( in the end). But what impact or change should take place is decided by the person who wishes to speak. Because “ words” can change a person forever, I suggest you pick peers that speak words of love when one most needs it. 

Atonment

Lost, found but dead

It was too late

The two lovers were lost

To the world they once loved                                                

They lived such a life – cupid did exist

 

They were born two worlds apart

Two very distant individuals

But cupid struck his mischief on them

There was no other way, Zeus explained

 

Roses and lilies and tulips all lined

The wind too played with her hat

The clouds as bright as the gods

He caught it just as the wind died

 

They both never denied it was then

That they found love & beauty

The blessed moments where intimate

Truly even the gods were jealous

 

The sun smiling and blessing

The Teasdale and Isabel in their

Joining in union with their souls

Was that their destruction?

 

Alas but the gods were not to be crossed

The clouds threatened to hold wrath

A beauty and her equal – William

They stayed and fought with vengeance

 

Neither will breathe without the other

The two lovers were banished.

For the last time the sun shinned,

The roses bloomed, the wind blew

 

The lovers Isabel and William walked

Hand in hand whispering their love

They turned memories flooding them

love, as they knew had no bounds

 

For a last time they kissed so full

Of love that would last forever

A covenant they created for others

Like themselves “until death do us part”

 

Death not meaning physically but

That of hearts beating together

The heavenly light engulfing them

They bid goodbye still holding hands

 

Too lost for words I watched

Me – the heavenly commissioner

Watched in awe and wonder

I myself seeking atonement

 

I forgave them for they reminded me

Of my own  lover who was lost.

They smiled and looked me in the eye

“Come unto our covenant, you shall

Find her there still waiting for you”

 

So I closed my eyes and spake

“ My Queen My Love ”

There she was awaiting my return

Still waiting on that rock…..

 

My joy knew no bounds

More than ever I now knew

I had achieved atonement

And My lady, My Soulmate

                                                                                                               

“Until death do us part……..” the last of the spells were said and now, she was caged for life. It was pretty simple, the way she said it but the intensity and truthfulness behind it was a lie. Cursing every single person present there for making her do this, Tea  wore a plastic smile of poison, her husband knew this –  everyone present for her wedding knew this. But still, the whole play acting would not be complete if the actress didn’t smile. She wore it just to enhance the surrounding. While she waited for the spectators to applaud, she gave a quick glance to her unknown husband. Just out of curiosity than hate. She hated herself for doing just that.

For a moment their eyes met and Tea found herself looking at a handsome guy a year older than she was. Not wasting her time, she turned her face away from him. Evaluating her gain in the business Tea smiled. Atleast she was free from her parents and could take decisions by herself. Smiling at the prospect, she walked down the aisle, determined not to look at the man walking beside her with her arm in his.

 

Bryce Pool looked at his bride she was beautiful beyond words. There was no other girl he’d seen who was more beautiful. She reflected light from her, the light that could give life to any dead soul. The warmth of her love was so rich, so powerful, he was intoxicated. Tea had this power that could draw anyone towards her. He considered himself blessed when the elders fixed her for him. Thought there was a powerful reason behind it… but things were not the way he thought it would be… the instant Tea found out her match she was upset. She was totally against the idea of getting married at such a slender age. She protested and fought for her freedom, she never wanted to be like her parents who were married young. She was a fighter, she wanted to explore the world and witness much of it’s wilderness, it’s beauty – exactly what Bryce had wanted to do and was doing – before he got married. Now after he said the vows, and looked at her to give a quick peck on her cheeks, she had turned her face away.

 

It doesn’t matter, I‘ll give you time to settle, then we can do all we want. He told himself.

 

He held out his arm for her to take, she took it, he got a glance from her, for a moment, their eyes met, he could see a hollow expression in her face, but it changed to a more serious expression – the one that speaks volumes about revenge and vengeance. He felt the color drain away from his face.

 

So, he thought, this is going to be one hateful, bumpy ride for both of us huh – well while I’m at it, I guess I can have all the fun I can. Bryce thought

 

The bastard thinks he can have fun with his way, well we’ll see about that. He’s gonna regret that he married me. From now on, I get my way. Tea thought

 

First, I think I’ll give her the space to do what ever she wants then I’ll reel her in; let her have her way first. 

 

Umm, I think he’s cute, tea found herself thinking, but I should stand my ground – I hate him to the core.

 

Only Cupid knew Tea was not going to – atleast not in the long run.

 

The ceremonies were over and it was time for the couple to return to their rooms. Bryce held an innocent smile, Tea understood and nodded to him, she took his hand and marched towards their room, hate glowing in her eyes. Once inside she locked the door shut and spoke through her teeth

 

“What you want to happen,” she said pointing an accusing finger at him “Is not going to happen, you might be married to me but it doesn’t give you the license

to – ”

“What are you talking about?” He asked trying to sound surprised.

 

 I think I am going to like her after all,  he thought surprised by the turn of things.

 

Trying to sound innocent huh, well you got me there. Allright then, u get it in full throttle then.

 

“Ok look” she emphasized, “I have a bunch of rules

whether you like it or not, you are going to

follow – ”

“So umm what are you going to do if I don’t?” Bryce asked interrupting her.

 

You are a carefree asshole, fine, I’ll give you the biggest punishment that you could imagine, just you wait. I’m infiltrating your life Bryce Grey, you wait.

 

Gosh she’s about to cry, man; I should have kept my mouth shut.

 But what do I care? Yea she’s beautiful……

God, she’s my wife I should be a little considerate,

fine Princess you have it your way.

 

“That will depend on what you chose to break” Tea retaliated suddenly finding strength to talk.

“I do have a reputation for breaking all the rules though, but I’ll try”  he offered smiling.

 

God, he has a beautiful smile, no wonder half the girls of the town were with him, I mean, he’s a flirt and all but he has a good everything, that ruffled black hair he kept, the deep blue eyes that seem like an ocean of knowledge, gorgeous smile, athlete build, the way he walked. –

Hey hey wait hold it gurl, you cannot fall in love with a two timer like him, remember??? He MARRIED you . ah, shut up.

 

“First – I won’t stand to be ordered around. I get my stuff done my way,

second- no public appearances together, and I won’t ever ever listen to any one regarding what I do or what I have to do or how I act.

Third – you and I are not happening ever, so even thought we are married we get to lead our own life however it is… ”  

 

something’s not right, why on earth is he having that stupid – ok so his grin is not so stupid after all but… did I say it wrong or does he take me for a fool??

 

So she has this all planned out, man she’s not like the other girls I’ve met.

Someday I’ll get her.  Just looking at her itself requires a great degree of control.

Ok she is mine I don’t care how long or how heartbreaking it’s gonna be but she is mine – it’s fixed. Now I gocha princess.

 

Feeling pleased with himself he replied.

 

“Ok we can lead our own lives, if you cooperate , we can make it together …”

“What part don’t you understand ? huh?? u drive me crazy u do really ”

“In love with me already?” he grinned even more.

 

This person in front of me just won’t get it will he ?

this this monster that have no feelings for me?

That jerk that looserific loser on earth of all the people in earth, I got him to bear?  

If he don’t get it I think this aught to catch his attention.

 

Man she is one sweetheart I’m gonna love to see when she’s angry .

 

The next thing Tea did was walk straight to him and kick him hard in the shin. With her peektoes. It might have really hurt- he yelled and was hopping at the same time. Tea smiled proud of her achievement.

 

Ha that caught him right he deserved it

that – god I hope he’s not hurt. Though.

 

He stopped hopping and sat on the bed wearing a pained expression on his face. Tea was sorry for him. He looked at her and sighed he got up and went to her limping a little, a serious expression on his face.

 

This is getting absurd Bryce, you’re hurting her feelings. Get a life.

 

 

“I’m sorry I’ll get a hold of myself…”

“You don’t have to I’ll do it my self” she said coldly. 

 

God why can’t she understand that I’m  in love with her already ?

Her stark black hair, the green eyes and a figure that you could kill for

There’s nothing so perfect like her.

 

“Good night Princess, sleep tight”  

 

Tea looked at him straight in the eye she could see the truthfulness in his eyes. She also saw a glimmer of love but it was hidden beneath a pool of shadows.

Tea nodded and said her good nights to him.

 

“Hey pass me the pillows” he said from the crouch near the window

“Get them yourself” tea replied half asleep.

“Oh I don’t know if it could be such a good idea, I might want to make you make up for that kick…. ”

“I’m too tired, you get it”.

“Al right if you promise to have breakfast tomorrow with the whole family”

 

Tea was angry; she got up and threw him the pillows. She had another plan in mind for tomorrow and breakfast was a big NO NO.

 

I hope he’s not mad at me …… he has such a gorgeous smile …….. good night, sleep tight and STAY there.

 

God she is a beauty, I hope she’s not mad at me for being so carefree…..

Good night princess ….

 

************************************************

 

“Ok when are you gonna divorce him?”

 

That question was startling, especially from her best friend – Jessica. Tea didn’t blame her she knew that Bryce was a playboy, everyone knew that. His women’s list seemed endless. Tea had skipped breakfast with the Grey family and went out with Jessica; for shopping. She had skipped out from Bryce’s mansion saying that she had to meet an important relative who was not able to make it for their wedding. Bryce had refused initially but then agreed to it after she promised to go shopping together later that day – which of course was not going to happen.

 

“I don’t know if I can Jess, I have to look out for my family honor, the decisions I take reflects upon my family too you know. All I know is that according to my family, I’m the most lucky person in the world, cuz I got to get married to that jerk who thinks that all the girls in the world belongs to him.”

 

The jerk he thinks he’s so smart in the head, I’m never going to forgive him for marrying me ever, it’s so unfair,

I’m chained to a jerk who apparently has no feelings for me and can do anything he wants. But me? I’m supposed to be sticking to him like a gum and forgiving him.

Well, Parents-in-Law, Welcome the new generation wife, ill make it as understanding as possible.

 

“Well, he’s a natural charmer, and he doesn’t stand being ordered around, especially from a girl, everybody just follows him – no questions asked”

 

“Oh pul-eese Jess, I told him to stay out of my business and he very much did – no questions asked”

 

There was a look of surprise in Jessica’s face

 

“No – Way. Ever. Look he’s just not that type that can be tamed. If you don’t believe me then you can ask Anne Calvin – she dated him once you know”

 

A flush of anger spread through Tea.

 

That that wordless ass on the face of earth, I loath him,

god why was I put into such a bad state? Now how do I know if he’s not kis

 

But Jessica’s voice cut through Tea’s thoughts.

 

“Hey isn’t that Bryce that’s coming??” she said pointing at the mall’s entrance

“No way – ”

 

That swear word why on earth is he doing this to me? What is he going to get from all this???

Ok gurl time to put on your angry mask and give it to him,

no wait if he hasn’t spotted me then I think I better spy on him to see if he’s meeting ‘neone.

 

“Yea that’s him. Listen -”

 

Too late just then Bryce rooted his direction towards them with an annoyed look on his face.

 

What is she doing here all by herself? Thank god she’s safe. I wonder how much lies I’ll have to put up withgod if the people find her here alone …… she’s done for….

Women, they’re all the same.

 

“What are you doing here? I thought you were going to your relative’s house” this better be having a good explanation.

“Well I did and she told me to stay with her for a few days so – “

“No she didn’t”

“Jess you weren’t there that time” that swear word how could she do this to me ? After all this talk?

“You are not going to stay with them anyway not alone” Bryce said firmly.

“Jess will be staying with me” bite it, or I’m never ever ever gonna talk to you in my life.

“No you are still not going to stay at your relatives’ house.” He paused. “Who is your relative anyway??”

“I thought I told you to stay out of my way.”

She spat with hate an anger stirred deep within her. Tea was reputed to have a bad temper. And right now she was starting to boil from within. Seeing the expression on Bryce’s face – which was of amusement.

 

“Well there was a huge loop hole – you said

“Our life” not “Your life”.

“So ?” tea asked Anger showing on her face.

 

 He flashed his brilliant smile again and tea’s heart did a vertical flip which made her even more angry.

 

“So you are not going anywhere alone just for the fun’s sake, especially when you’ve lied to a whole family-”  

 

His family? The same people who threatened to burn down the family house if I never married their son? how could he?

hold on tea you can’t cry in front of him

but why is he doing this to me? Who does he think I am?

I hate you Bryce.

 

“I hate you!” she nearly screamed.

 

tea found herself standing; shaking head to foot, from anger and sorrow, she couldn’t live like this at all.

 

“Ah the usual line-”

“Why are you doing this now? We had an agreement!

Why is it that you like to see me being tortured? What do you get from all this??”  

 

“Ok ok break time-” Jess’s voice cut through the drama

 

But tea didn’t listen, she took her bad and ran towards the entrance, tears falling down, the whole world seemed to shun her, no one was merciful, not even her parents could do anything about it not when they themselves had a dept to pay the Grey Family.

 

Shit. I hurt her feelings.

Why whyyy on earth do I have a big mouth that always incidentally hurt tea?

God she’s so sensitive

great here she goes running I’ve got to get to her or else’s she might be caught, or worst, she’ll be killed for al I know she’s my wife dam-it.

Tea I swear I won’t open my mouth again.

 

Fear tore over Bryce like a knife, he had to get to Tea before she reached outside, if he’s a little late, if anything happens, he’ll never forgive himself……

Bryce tore after her dodging other people in his way. His heart hammering and fear driving him crazy, he dodged another woman his eyes missed her for a second and Tea was gone.

He rushed outside the entrance and saw her cross the road towards a park, wiping her eyes with her hands, her summer dress flapping in the light breeze. He rushed after her cursing himself for being so indifferent towards her.

By the time he found her, she sitting in a bench facing a pond crying quietly.

 

“I’m sorry” please believe me

“It’s alright”

“Here I’ll take you home” He offered

“No thank you” tea snapped

“You can’t be out here alone”

“I’m not a kid who don’t know how to-”

 

Great I’m snapping. So Shut it.

 

Should I tell her? She deserves to know, but it’s too dangerous

No way, she’ll think I’m crazy and swear me out of her life for ever.

What difference does it make? She already hates me…

 

“I came for some shopping in the mall, I thought I might as well get you something”

“You don’t need to get anything for me”

 

Wait did he just say he’d come here to buy me something?????

 Why would he do that?

Because then I might forgive him and go home with him and

He could win me over.  HA nice try.

 

“Just leave me alone here for sometime so I can breathe and get a grip for myself.

“I’m afraid I can’t do that” I hate me

 

That’s it I’ve had enough.

 

“Why is so hard for you to understand that I need sometime so that I can cope up with this whole new idea that I-AM-A-MARRIED-WOMAN? can’t you realize that I need my time to cope up?? Huh?”

“Do you realize that you are scaring the ducks away?” he asked awkwardly

“What?”

“You came here to feed the ducks right? Well they’re scared, you’re scaring them away look”  Bryce said pointing towards the pond.

 

what on earth is this swear word talking about? He still thinks I am kidding what will it take for him to realize that I am dead serious? Tea gave him one hard look and turned towards the direction he was pointing and that’s when she heard the voice

 

“Hey dad !!” Bryce said pretending to be surprised on seeing his dad.

 

“Bryce?? What are you doing here?”  His dad asked looking surprised.

 

Tea was stricken beyond words she just starred at the father and the son tongue tied.

 

“Nothing, just feeding the ducks” he replied casually.

tea admired his fluency.

 

“Ah tea, I didn’t know you come around here, I come here every morning to exercise”  He said finally turning his gaze towards her.  And that’s when she realized that Bryce was in his track suits too.

 

‘Tea, weren’t you supposed to be at your relative’s?”

“Yes I was, but she wanted to see both of us together, so we sort of planned to meet here in the park because Bryce had to take his morning walks and I had to get Aunt a gift…”

“Bryce is going to meet your Aunt in track Suit?” His father echoed.

“yea, there’s no probs.”

“We’re going walking so we can catch up.” Bryce claimed in putting a hand on her shoulder.

 

Man she’s a sweetheart, how does she come up with these lame excuses anyway? Well one thing is for sure she don’t want anyone to know that the marriage is crumbling. Good I get a point there.

 

Just what the hell does he think of himself? Just cuz I allow him some space….

He’s having his arm on my shoulder!!!!! Is he in love with me already? It feels so good…

Gurl snap out of it, he tried to kill you remember??? And not to mention he is a MAJOR womaniser. And I hate him.

 

Satisfied with the answer, Bryce’s dad wished them a good day and left them to their business. The minute Bryce’s dad moved on, tea pushed Bryce away and looked him in the eye, and said in a slow voice

 

“I’m going to stay at Jess’s house, without you. Which means –

“Either I am coming with you or you are not going at all. Look Tea, I know that you want some time to cope up and stuff, but right now, you have to be with me. I’ll explain later why, but you have to listen to me. It will all come down to the good of you I swear. Please”

 

tea looked at him with disgust and finally nodded,

“We’ll go together and remember, I hate you for this ever”

 

Bryce nearly cried in happiness. He was so happy that he swore he’d not maker her cry ever – during the stay. Not that he could control himself. He broke into a grin,

 

“I knew you would understand”

“Oh yea? This better be having a good explanation from your side… ”

“When the time comes I will let you know about everything. I SWEAR”

 

tea just closed her eyes and went to the mall, Bryce going with her.

Having spotted Jess at a cafe WITH her fiancé, who was kissing her even when tea approached, them. Tea felt jealous.

Just then, Jess and her fiancé – Dean pulled away and was facing them. Tea smiled but soon her smile disappeared when she saw Dean turn pale on seeing Bryce.

 

“So umm u guys know each other I assume?” tea said looking at Bryce who went still.

“Yea we do know each other personally right dean?”

“How do you know him Tea?” dean asked ignoring Bryce.

“Umm he’s my he’s my, husband” dean looked stunned.

And cold, from his eyes. It was no trouble finding out that that both the parties hated each other and were in a position to fight any moment.

“How come?” Dean asked a little surprised

 

that was a struggle to get it out. ALAS I have proved to be vulnerable.

OH SHUT  UP ! TEA u speak as if you r drunk, which is not the case.

ok wait what is going on ? how on earth does Dean know Bryce?

Why do they hate each other?

Does it concern me By ANY chance???

 

“Umm we got married u know” tea said a little nervous

“You really don’t know what you are getting yourself into do you Tea?” Dean asked cold eyeing Bryce

“If you care you’d help me out right now” Tea shot back

“Yea Dean I’ll see you in the hospital with no bones left then. That would be a sight I could cherish” Bryce told him cold looking at him in the eye

“You don’t have to threaten him if it concerns you, you know, I’ll make him tell me” tea said this time looking at Bryce.

“Well what would tea say if she knew ?” Dean said straightening his hair, with his hand.

“Knew what?” tea asked her heart pounding in her throat. What was Dean hiding that could shake Bryce?

“Knew that umm ….. ”

“Dean don’t do this” Jess said in a quiet plea.

“What is it what are you all hiding?”

“Nothing” jess said

“Bryce what is it? I won’t get mad at you I promise!! Please what is going on?” tea asked her hear hammering in her chest

“Oh it was nothing just that he was involved in an accident.” Dean said indifferent to the threat by Bryce.

“What accident?” Tea asked as if he life depended on it.

“There was an accident that I was involved in” Bryce said suddenly.

“You didn’t kill any one did you?” tea asked dead scared.  He looked at her, his eyes were red with tears.

“I did” He paused and added quietly “she was my fiancé then”

“But but – you – Bryce how? I never knew I….. ” tea was suddenly crying, it was too much for her to bear.

“Tea I knew this would shake you, he told me. Bryce did I never had the nerve to tell you …..”

“Do you know how much this have cost me?”  tea looked at Jess. Dean looked pleased at the turn of things although he was not smiling or anything.

“Bryce when did this happen?”

“It happened two years back ” Dean answered. “ and you don’t have to cry .”

“I – I’m sorry, it’s just that there was so much I was trying to suppress I guess. I’m sorry” tea managed. She wiped her tears and went to Bryce who was smoking with his back turned to her, she went to him and put a kind hand on his shoulder,

“I’m sorry, I never knew and I’m not mad at you or anything. It must have been hard for you.”

“You have no idea” he said turning towards her and putting off the cegrette. “I’ve never met anyone like her before…” Tea felt a pang. And she suddenly felt hollow and vulnerable. She didn’t know what to say that could possibly make him happy, she knew the kind of situation he was in. And she felt sorry for him – it wasn’t like her to. But a part of her – a large part of her felt sorry that he had to go through all this at such a young age. So instead she just said,

“Let’s go home Bryce I wanna go have some lunch.”

He looked at her with shining eyes that said a thousand ‘thank you for understanding me.’ And took her back home – his home – his real home.  

The first thing Tea did when she reached was to go to the kitchen and make something for herself. She made smashed potatoes and went straight to the garden to have them. She needed to think about what happened at the mall that morning, everything seemed to be swimming in front of her but above all, Bryce was in her mind, dominating a large part of it. Just as She sat down on the grass, Bryce’s mother – Clare came up to her, with a maid. Tea looked up but didn’t smile.

 

“Hello Tea”

“Hi. Clare”

“What happened? Why did you come back? And what are you doing here child?”

“Go away I need some air and I’m hungry.”

“Who do you think you are commanding child? I am Bryce’s mother and remember that you are not with your parents here. Why on earth did I accept his proposal, I don’t understand”

“Whatever the reason he chose me, I stand by it not that it should bother you, but whatever, now can you please let me think?”

“Well said, I’d say no one has talked to me with such devotion about their husbands especially when they are forced to marry someone other than their own pick.” she paused. “I came to get to know you a little better but now I see that it was such a big mistake to even try. You collage girls think you know everything” with that Clare just turned and left the garden leaving Tea all to herself. To think. But before she could get down to some serious thinking, she found Bryce coming towards her with a taunt expression on his face.

“What?”

“What, what?” he said a little  annoyed. “Why’d you speak to my mum that way?”.

“What way?” Tea asked as if she’d been hit in the head.

“You know she told me that you were annoyed with her and that you talked to her inappropriately and stuff”  tea just stared at him while her mind was racing in all directions that was in between anger and annoyance.

 

O.M.G talk about MONSTER IN LAW. That was not what she told me. What kinda liar is she ???? she totally hate this marriage. Tea realised.

 

“I did – but I didn’t – she never- do you really think?” tea blabbered. Getting close to bursting out with tears.

 

OH GOD, I am blabbering remind me to kill that old shag when I get the  perfect opportunity to. Bryce don’t look like he’s convinced. Shit- that’s what I really am into this time. SO MUCH FOR THE WORST DAY IN MY LIFE.

 

This is crazy, is tea really telling the truth?

Or is tea lying just to get her side of things? 

god she handled more than what she could have

ill take her out today before I leave for tomorrow.

Hope she comes.

 

“I don’t know what to think, Cuz mum’s like a chameleon, she knows how to change situations according to the need It doesn’t mean that I pull away everything she said. She won’t scream without reason you know” 

 

Tea said a silent prayer and looked up at him

 

“She told me that she hadn’t met any one who spoke about their husbands with such passion” tea said weakly not looking up at him.

 

“RELLY?” Bryce asked sitting down beside her. “Well that’s definitely a compliment, judging from mum’s attitude on everything more beautiful than her, its sarcastic though. She’s a li’ll jealous. Really”

“Oh common, your mum looks like she is just 30. And she is beautiful. I don’t think I can compete even if I want to cuz well she’s just too good”

“Oh yea? How does plastic surgery sound to you?”

 

Bryce asked. Tea swallowed she never expected this from Claire.

 

“Look I know it might be initially hard to adjust for both of you, so umm.. I’m leaving you guys to cope up an stuff”

“How do you mean leaving?”

“Well” Bryce swallowed “ I’m leaving for Dubai tomorrow for business purposes”

“How long are you gonna be away?”

“1 month”

“1 month?” tea echoed aloud “Are you nuts??? One month is way too long time for business trips and I can’t possibly….” Tea was about to say survive without you for a month with your parents but caught herself before admitting such an obvious mistake and instead concluded by saying “nothing” rather hastily.

“Oh well you can come if you want but it’s gonna be boring cuz I’ll be gone at weird hours of the day. And Dubai is really boring. There’s nothing much to see anyway. Besides it’s too early for a honeymoon – I’m really broke….” Bryce grinned.

“I hate you. And I am COMING for your little Business trip. Do you know why? It’s cuz I don’t trust you one bit.”

Bryce just smiled.

 

Bingo, I got her just where I want her.

He thinks he’s smarty pants ;well I got news for him.

 

Tea got up with a swift moment and walked towards the huge house that was decorated with fancy artifacts which looked as if they were purchased from the museum, and started to pack whatever little cloths she had brought with her. Oddly enough, Bryce was happy for most of the day, smiling and laughing with everyone. But he made it a point to avoid Tea throughout.

 

The next day which was a Saturday, was a wet day the November Chills was already taking a toll on them, delaying their arrival at the airport. It was no wonder then when they had missed their first flight to Dubai. And for the second one, there was too much delay due to the weather that they finally ended taking a room in a hotel nearby to catch the next earliest flight to Dubai the following day. Tea was so exhausted from waiting for the plain that Bryce had to support her until they reached their suite. It was around 4 in the afternoon when she awoke from her tiredness. They had a quite lunch in their room. Tea was happy for the food they ordered – it was plain burgers and some coke. The rest of the afternoon, tea spent her time reading some old mags and watching TV, it was not entertaining, but she dared not ask Bryce if she could go out. Besides, he was not even in the suite all afternoon. Tea had derived a resolution which was simple – only ask help under desperate circumstances. By dinner time, at around 7 in the afternoon, Bryce had returned to the suite with a few shopping bags in his hand and tea could tell that he was exhausted from the shopping spree. Still, she never bulged from where she was sitting or ask him where he’d been all this while. It was simply none of her business and she left it at that, although the curiosity that was inside her never seemed to stop growing.

He glanced at her and smiled, she didn’t return the smile and pretended to be interested at the news at the television, although she had heard it a thousand times that day. He threw his wallet at a nightstand and walked up to Tea and passed her a few bags.

“they’re some cloths for my cousin’s kids and that cover” he said pointing at the ones he gave tea

“Are the cloths for Stacy and Eric – my cousin”

“Which one?”

“My cousin? It’s Eric”

“ why did you buy – oh they’ve got baby kids?”

“Twins, they’re adorable totally naughty and they’re 18 months”

“they didn’t come for the wedding did they?”

“no they didn’t” Bryce said. when tea started opening the bags, he asked,

“do you think she’s gonna like it?” he asked climbing the bed and setting with his legs crossed.

“ I don’t know, um. Describe Stacy” tea said unable to take her eyes off from the cloths in front of her.

“ she looks really good”

“tell me about her features I mean, ok, Like umm. classy features like long pointed nose, round face. What?” tea found herself blabbering things without any sense it was as if her brain had switched to automatic mode, while her mind was someplace else while her eyes were fixed at Bryce.

Bryce seemed to reflect on this for a while and replied in a slow low voice that revealed honesty, his eyes boarding to tea.  “she’s like you – beautiful ” Tea was blushing red and she could feel her face heat up with emotion. For a minute no one spoke they just starred at each other as if nothing else existed in the world. It was a great moment, only it was cut short by Bryce’s phone ringing. And that was tea’s cue to land from romantic world to reality and tea hated it. They would have landed in a kiss if it wasn’t for the stupid cell phone. Tea suppressed her anger and waited. Her mind racing in all directions possible.

 

What is going on with me???? Today I am alone with him on a trip to Dubai cuz I don’t trust him for some reason. How is it any of my business??? Cuz I’m his wife?????

And here I am angry that I can’t kiss him.

Is there something wrong with me ??

I don’t know this person yet and I, I can’t stop liking him, even when tomorrow he can

Just dump me for a better  girl. Or even worst, begin an illicit relationship with another

woman and leave me in the dark all by myself, I might even have his kid in me by then….

 

Wait did I just say that ?????????????? eeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhh !!!!!!!!!!!

 

I better stay away from him. I don’t want another heartbreak, this is bigger than me.

Besides he didn’t get anything for me today. Jerk. Freak. Idiot. Selfish. I hate him.

Beautiful like me huh big wow, I am beautiful that’s why he married me.

Forget the scary thoughts. And think of something else.

He’s looking hot as usual,

No he’s not! I mean, I like his tee and baggies and all.

 God, I hate him.

 

WHY *colorful swear word* did this stupid lady call me just now, JUST now when I was finally going to kiss her – a mission I couldn’t accomplish when we got married even!!!  Shit, the tickets they’re due –

“tonight?  But no one informed us ”

“ yes, fine then we’ll be there

Fine, thank you … bye ”

“tea we need to leave as soon as possible, our flight is up in an hour ” he said glancing at his

Rolex. Tea smiled her lips trembling, she braced herself for the flight and Dubai.

 

 

The first thing Tea felt when she landed on the Dubai international Airport was how hot it felt.

And how dull it was. The roads were plain and there was hardly a splash of color anywhere. In short – Dubai seemed to be a boring place to be living in  – for a month.

 

But atleast, I have this jerk to keep me company for a month. And his cousins and their twins ……

 

It was late at night when they reached the Palm and went to bed. (tea slept in the bed and Bryce slept in the crouch). It as late in the morning when Tea woke up from her tiredness, by the sound of two babies wailing from the next room. There were voices from the background, talking to Bryce, who was up and ready before her from the clock she could see that he might be finishing his breakfast. She undressed and showered before showing her face to her new relatives. But before she could reach the kitchen or find out where it was, she bumped into a little kid who was around 6.

“ oww !!!! mom – ” that was when tea was fully awake.

“ I’m sorry I didn’t see you ” tea began. suddenly taking notice of the small girl with Brunette hair that hung a little over her shoulders. The girl was surprisingly beautiful, with hazel eyes and a lean figure and sharp features.   

“ it’s alright ok? I thought you were my mum.” She paused. “Did you see her?”  

“ is that how you speak to our guests Bella?” said a voice which emerged from the side, which was the entrance of the master bedroom The voice, tea assumed to be Stacy’s.

“ go to your room and do your homework or no playing for you today” Stacy yelled , as Bella rushed past the two of them towards her room. The woman looked at Tea and smiled, behind her there were two chubby babies who looked so scared on seeing her, that tea glanced down at herself to see if she wore anything scary.

The twins who were both boys looked at each other and at their mother. Stacy caught sight of this and laughed,

“ all babies are scared when they first see a stranger tea. ” tea was embarrassed she smiled and went towards the babies while Stacy watched, not moving.

tea kneeled and pulled one of their cheeks and said “ hello. ” the babies dashed for their mother’s legs and held on to them as if they were going to die if they let go. Stacy laughed at this and pushed the babies away from her. The babies started to cry Stacy  who was not surprised at this, tried to comfort the babies. Just then and just then Eric and Bryce came by. Bryce was dressed in a white vest top and military shorts. Tea stared at him for a moment; he had that perfect combination of what we call – underwear model bodies and features  that would make any girl go weak at the knees. Tea was too busy with all the fighting and hating that was in between them, she barley noticed his gorgeous body – which she knew Jess would actually die for. Not that Tea wouldn’t… tea stole a quick glance at herself. She wore a billabong tee and levis jeans that was torn at the knee. Looking at Bryce, she felt a little out of place. Tea admired Stacy, she was indeed beautiful, with her green eyes and long brunette hair that Stacy’s daughter, Bella inherited. And she had a good figure for a mother of three. Mark walked to the twins and picked one of them up. The other one was tugging at his mother’s skirt, trying to catch her attention. Stacy ignored this, until he began to cry. By this time, Bryce was standing beside Tea and she found herself wandering away as if Tea had no control of her own mind.

 

He looks hottttttttt !!!!!!!!

Where does he get such a killer bod ???? how come I never noticed it before???????

Quit starring, he’s gonna get the wrong message…..

WHO CARES??????????

Ummm….. u r supposed to hate him you know ………..

I don’t CARE !!!!!!!!

Ah look at Stacy, and Eric they’re such a good couple……..

 Aye, do we look cute?

that jerk is too much  into those kids,

ring ring you jerk, I exist u know.

Uh great, I must be red with anger, Eric’s looking my way.

Smile, please

Ill kill you for this Bryce. cuz

I hate you

 

“tea are you feeling hot?”

“Eric, I think she’s stuffy, tea why don’t you go change? Ill lend you some of my skirts until we can go shopping later today come here”

Tea glanced at Bryce who was grinning at her. She just starred at him, getting even redder as she did so. Partly because she was blushing and because she was angry that she couldn’t just punch him in the face for ignoring her. Stacy led Tea to the master bedroom one of the twins still in her hand… once there, she put the baby down. Since Tea was away from Bryce, she asked,

“Stacy, what’s his name?” Stacy ignored the question

“ Craig, come here.” Stacy called as she was searching for a good skirt for Tea. Tea was startled at this first and then peeped over to see where Craig was.

“Craig, leave the ant alone and come here” Stacy yelled glancing at his direction. Craig was too busy stamping the ant with his bare feet, he didn’t come. Stacy handed the skirt to Tea and went to where Craig was busy stamping the ant. And pulled him away from the ant.

“naughty naughty boy, I won’t give you a chocolate today.” Tea looked at the pink skirt that she was given. It was a plain linen skirt with a cute polka dot ribbon tied to one end. It looked cute and Tea said so to Stacy. To which Stacy replied with a laugh, “It used to fit me when I was your age. It was the first thing ever Eric bought me after our wedding”. Suddenly turning her attention to Craig.

“ come Craig, say your aunt a HI” the little boy looked at Tea and said a “hi” that was barley audible to Tea.

“Craig, I didn’t here it ” Stacy said sternly. Craig clapped his hands together and looked at Tea. He had blue eyes like his father Eric.  Tea Noticed.

“ hi, howau?. ” Tea laughed at this, the baby was a cutie pie.

“ Im fine, how are you?” Craig handed her his hand for a hand shake. Tea took it and smiled.

“ what is your name Craig?” Tea said on purpose

“ cake ” he replied innocently. Tea laughed and the baby laughed with Stacy.  

“he can’t pronounce his name right till now, so he calls himself cake” Stacy said in between the laughter.

“ come here cake, ill give you chocolate for dessert, I’ve bought a whole box just for you.” Tea said holding out her arms for Craig to come. He looked at his mum and turned his head away.

“ now Tea, you didn’t have to, there are chocolate thieves here you know ” 

“ are you talking about me, Stacy?” Eric said entering the spacious room with the other twin in his arm, and Bryce following closely.

“ oh yea I forgot Eric.” Stacy said turning to Tea.if my kids know how to fight over Chocolate, then Eric knows how to steal it better than them.”  Tea laughed at this. Eric was wearing knee length Shorts and a billabong tee. “sorry hon. Just briefing her about the customs in this house” Stacy said kissing his cheeks. “hey, I learned it from my cousin, he was my guru.” Tea looked at Bryce.hey! I’m innocent,” he added  “ we pass knowledge necessary for survival.” Headed turning to tea wearing one of those lazy smiles that would take your breath away.

“you’ve already met Cake right, ill show you Hayden” he said taking the twin from Eric’s arm, who reddily accepted, obviously Bryce knew them before.  “Hayden say hi to your new aunt Tea.

“ hi” the kid said frightened.

“hello Hayden, what’s your name?” tea asked smiling with her teeth. The kid smiled back and replied  “ mama calls me Hayden” the kid replied Tea laughed at this and the kid was smiling. “there you go, you have mummy’s boys”. Bryce Commented. Everyone laughed at this. It was truly an amazing family. And Tea felt jealous that she never had any kids for herself – she just loved them. And to think that she would ever had any chances of starting a family with Bryce seemed too far off to her now.

Tea caught Bryce stealing glances at her.

“Tea why don’t you have some breakfast?” Bryce asked suddenly, looking at Tea.  “you didn’t have anything properly during the flight….”

“why not ?” Stacy asked

“ I I don’t like the food they serve”  Tea stammered.

“she likes homemade food” Bryce piped up.

“ yea” Tea agreed wondering how Bryce came to know of it.

“Well then,” Stacy said looking at Eric “ call Bella Eric, we ladies have breakfast to catch up with, tea why don’t you go change to my skirt while I set the table??”

“alright”  tea said enthusiastically, thought she wasn’t one bit all because of Bryce. Back in her room, she searched and searched for a good top that would go with the linen skirt Stacy had lend her. Finally after a little hunt in her tiny wardrobe, she settled for a pink sleeveless vest top that hung to her curves like they should. Satisfied at last she dressed hurriedly and went down to the kitchen. As Tea entered Bryce got up to carry one of the twins from the baby chair. Eric who was talking to Bella stopped and looked up at Tea. Bella craned her head to look too. Stacy, having heard tea come, stopped what ever she was doing and turned to look at Tea, and Bryce who had is back turned to Tea, picked up the baby and turned to look at Tea and by this time, Tea noticed that the room had fallen silent. Feeling akward at the sudden attention she received, Tea walked up to Stacy  

Smiling sweetly to Eric, ignoring Bryce completely. She didn’t realize it then, suddenly her anger towards Bryce went away, and she felt victorious that she managed to catch the eyes of both Eric and Bryce. Suddenly her hunger vanished and she was happily helping Stacy with the setting of the table, she was so happy that it actually showed on her face. Stacy having noticed the sudden change asked her why she was so happy, Tea just brushed off the question by saying that she was feeling stuffy earlier and that she was much better now.  

By noon everyone was stuffed and settled in the living room to watch a movie – Fatastic 4 – the rise of the silver surfer.

It was a family movie and everyone enjoyed it. Especially Bella, who completed her homework beforehand just to see the movie. After the movie at 4, they decided to go for shopping at Burjuman Center. Tea found the mall boring too and was glad they had a car, because the Queue for a Cab was so long she was sure she would die of exhaustion. By the time they got back home, the twins were asleep and Bella was on Tea’s lap dozing off after a day of fun. Bryce sat next to Tea, occasionally pointing out a few landmarks on the way home. But most of the time, he just sat there in silence either looking at the twins or just simply sitting quietly, looking out of the window. Stacy and Eric were deep in conversation about some company matters. The ride back home was the longest Stacy had endured in her life, there was too much traffic and the cars were barely moving. Soon she too felt her eyes close, her head involuntarily falling on Bryce’s shoulder. It was past one in the morning when Bryce finally woke up Tea. Her eyes first refused to open to the constant shaking her shoulders by Bryce. Then, when he finally whispered something to her ear, her eyes finally gave up and opened a bit, Grumbling to herself, she opened the doors and followed him, carrying Bella to the house. She tucked Bella to bed first and then went to her bedroom. When she reached there, she didn’t take off her shoes, she just slumped down. She didn’t even feel the mattress or the impact of the fall, she was essentially asleep even before she hit the mattress.  

Tea opened her eyes a little as the winter streamed through the window. She was hugging a pillow or so it seemed to her. She shifted about with her eyes closed still trying to catch some sleep the morning lay ahead and lazy. Tea loved cuddling with her blanket and pillow. She always did that on lazy winter mornings. She might even have a teddy next to her. But right that morning, When Tea finally opened her eyes, to cuddle up next to the pillow, she got the shock of her life. Sleeping right next to her was Bryce. Tea first thought it was a dream. Then when she finally managed to get out of the bed did she realize that she wasn’t really dreaming. She quietly changed into her proper cloths and went to him. By that time, Bryce was awake and starting to sit up in his bed. He saw tea and went wide eyed.

“tea ?” he said half sleepy, suddenly realizing the figure in front of him, he said “tea tea im so sorry. ”

“ you are aren’t you?” tea said with hate.

“ you don’t understand-”

“ realy??? now it’s me who don’t understand?”

“ listen to me please”

“me ? try everyone else in the world, but not me ever”

“tea please, I slept off”

“ yes, you did sleep –  with me.”

“ Yes but wait, it was cuz – ”

“ I thought you different for a moment, but now, you are no different from a rapist who lures their victims in.” Tea spat

“ what?!!! Tea, you possibly can’t ”

Bryce was looking desperate, he wanted to talk but Tea didn’t give him the chance to speak.

“I can’t believe that I trusted you for a minute there, you are nothing but a despo, an and and stay away from me ever.”

Stung with tears Tea walked out. She went to the living room and slumped to a sofa and started crying. She cried and cried until she got sore. It was 8 in the morning and no one was awake. Tea sat there for a long time thinking. Thinking about the time she made her cousin tell Bryce that she was least interested in the marriage, while she hid herself in a dark corner of the room and watched. She had seen Bryce then for the first time. And she did take a liking to him, although she refused to go out for a date with him.

She sat like this for a long time wandering away mentally. Tea was so into herself that she didn’t notice Stacy walking towards her.

“ Tea, why you crying?”

“Stacy you have no business in this, it’s between me and Bryce”

“well then I have every right to interfere in it”

“it’s nothing, it’s just a small fight we got ourselves into”

“and you are crying so hard?” Stacy pressed “ Stacy you don’t understand” Tea started.

“ I know how you feel.” Stacy was quiet. “ Cuz I was in the same spot once. “ tea looked up shocked

“ What? Stacy you too?”

“ they’re all the same?”

“ well it is a family thing I think”

“ why ? why do they do it?”

“ there’s a strong motivation behind it. I’m not sure if I know the whole story behind it. But according to what Eric’s told me….. ”    

“ Stacy, have you gone out of your mind????  These people are setting up their sons with women !!!!! who in this 20th centaury would do such a thing ??????????”

Stacy looked at Tea for a moment. Tea couldn’t read Stacy’s expression, her eyes were brimming with tears again. Stacy sat down next to Tea with a sigh.

“ I don’t know how much you believe in astrology, the whole existence of this very family is purely based on the matches the elders fix. Now let me take my own case, I hated Eric more than you can imagine, you atleast pretend to be a happy couple. But I hated Eric and I made sure . Sure he was charming and all, but he fooled me into this marriage. You cant imagine how I felt when I found out. I went Ballistic, I never ate anything for two whole days, and I didn’t hide that I hate him. At one point of time this marriage was headed for divorce and that shook the whole foundation of this family. They consulted people even from India at one point of time. And all because of the tantrums I throw sometimes” Tea had dried her tears and listened to the story that Stacy recited for her. So far all she could think was how much Stacy was like her, they certainly had something in common.

“ and through out the whole time, Eric just never left my side. I used to hurt his feeling so often, I think he’s got used to it. But he never said a word about his family. He just never stoped loving me. And one day all of a sudden, it was like – I can’t explain it, I just fell in love with him. And I stopped throwing unnecessary tantrums, I stopped hurting him. It was really great. And the following year we went to collage together, but we had Bella so I had to drop out of collage, Eric graduated and well look where we are now, I can’t live a day without seeing him.” “Stacy, no offence, but could you please get to the point as to why we have so much in common?”

“oh sorry, I got a little carried away”

“ well where was I ? oh yea the elders, you see the Grey family have a long history, they go back to the nineteen hundreds and you can imagine how old they are if they still have a generation now, so these people were rich from back then and they were the respected lot in their village. Now the first Grey was a man, his name I think was William. He was like a reckless lad and had a wild passion for women. Just when he turned 18, he was to be married off. He didn’t like the idea of getting married, but you know the tradition then, so he finally chose a beautiful girl called Elizabeth. Now Elizabeth was the daughter of well, she was believed to be a witch. William did not know this Of course, so he married her. Elizabeth was a cleaver lady, she found out that William was a womanizer. But she kept Quiet about this, After three years of her marriage with William, a rumor arose that Elizabeth was a witch. William found out this and tried to kill his pregnant wife. He tortured her physically and mentally, before giving her up to the Church. They tortured her again. She was 6 months pregnant at that time. She screamed that her husband was a womaniser, she begged for mercy, but at last she stood her ground and confessed to being a witch. The church burned her. And in the fire she screamed curses for the whole Grey family. William laughed at her, he had the Church on his side and denied all counts of adultery. But from that day onwards, no men from that family was allowed to fall in love with a girl. The ones who did lost their wives but their line continued. It was their curse, their burden to carry to this day. And the worst part is that they have to get married at 18 or they don’t ever get married. Anyways, thy can’t just get married to any one they want. The women or the men they choose have to match, you can’t take a risk in this. You have to stick to a wife/husband for life. Now to find out whom to get married to, they consult an astrologer. He takes the birth date and spiritual details and see if his particular person is matches with this other person. And if it all turns out to be good, then well you have a lucky couple. Like me and Eric, we fell in love after we got married and we are happy together. ” Tea stared at Stacy. She just sat there not believing what she heard from Stacy.

 

God, I’ve just got myself into more shit

What is this woman talking about ???????

Witches??? astrologers???? Curses???

How did Stacy fall for this scheme. ???

 

“ look Tea, no one is trying to enforce on you. I went ballistic when I heard about this and god knows what I did when I found out. But then, I came to realize that it was the truth.” Stacy looked uncertain but continued

“Look if you still have your doubts, you can check out the family tree.” She paused “When you go back with Bryce.”

“ Stacy, WITCHES? Curses? How can all of this fit in? these are just superstitions and some made up stuff that people no longer believe in. How is this a reason for ruining a life? I thought you of all people would know better. But you’re no different then.”

Stacy wanted to say something more but shut up when she heard her babies cry. She rushed to the kitchen to get the feeding bottles filled with milk for the babies. Tea was once again left alone with the empty living room. Though it was early, she felt herself going back in time. Back to the time when her parents had met Bryce’s parents. Tea remembered it as if it happened yesterday.

It was a bright and sunny summer day with loads of sun. Tea and her parents went off to the beach, for a friend’s wedding. It was a sunset ceremony and everyone was asked to wear a sun dress. Tea was the bridesmade and she got to donn a exotic green number from Roboto Cavalli. She had her hair blow dried and, dyed Brown for the occasion. It was a beautiful ceremony and tea was happy for the newly wed couple. It was like a get away for her after her failed relationship with James. The wedding was the perfect getaway for her as she got to mingle with other people and frankly, enjoy her life, not being afraid of what others would say if she was spotted dancing with someone else.

        

 

            

 

 

 

The class hours

The office hours

 

U shud reach skl by 8

 

u can reach your work place by 9

U always get a break after 45 min of distraction ( in the form of teachers ) and then your break time etc.etc…

We don’t exactly get a break, we’re just “jobless” sometimes ( in my case, (im a trainee) most of the time)

You always get to catch up on the latest gossip and the dummest thing ( that preferably some1 did when they were asked out)

The latest gossip is here are the new competitors in business ( who needs a lullaby????)

There are loads of peeps around you

The only peeps around you are your collegues and you BOSS ( he’s a swear word on his own)

You get to bunk classes

How on earth can you bunk your own bread earnings???? ( hum this is not like skl )

 

Your teachers are always there for you to swear and remind you that you have to swear at them.

The peeps here are always on the move, you don’t get the opportunity or the time to remind yourself that you have to swear at them !!!!!!

The bus is always there to pick you up frm skl and back to the front of your house

You have to go to the ends of earth to catch your bus to work !!!

Aye you have to wear your skl uniform

You can show off your new outfit (to your colleagues in office ) (ha ha … you can see the jealousy in their faces and laugh to yourselves )

You have to write a loooot of tests and exams ( and hide the results from your mum)

No tests or exams or assessments  yay !!!!!!

You can use your slang

No slang allowed ( no swear word either )

There’s always the sisterhood of

Lonely pands there ( you can really scream, shout, swear, laugh, conspire…..)

There are no sisterhood(s) here.  (we’ll b deported for forming such “sisterhoods”)

Today of all days I am sitting in a chair and actually wondering if I fit in!!!!!!!!

Not that there’s something wrong in a chair, it’s just that I’m not so sure that I have what it takes to win the trust and my part in the position of front desk coordinator. I whish I was in here for a real job. This is utterly boring I could have taken my book and started to read. Gosh!!! this is too much to bear; not even my talents are exposed here. No one even bothers to claim that I exist in this office not even in their minds. Let alone reality!!!

The next time though I’m bringing my USB, my story book (I know it sounds lame)

But I have no other way to kill time, atleast at home I could snugg up in my chair or bed and pretend there’s always an adventurous tomorrow!!! ( yea right like that’s gonna happen ) that reminds me, I can’t believe this is actually happening !!!! I thought I would stay at home for the rest of my life!!!! Thank god that there’s a god up above!!! Else I would have been doomed!! For life right now, life don suck but you never know, so I’m thankful!

It’s 9: 40 now and I sat in this chair for like 25 min an I’m already feeling home sick!!!!!

Ok that was Brenda she just called me to say a “ OMG is this realy true ???” yupp!!!!!! I still am wondering if this is reality or if I am still dreaming, Oh well make the best of what you got……